Wednesday, March 23, 2011


I got on the scale yesterday morning and the beautiful number staring back at me was a number I had not seen in a couple months.  Although, a couple months ago when I saw it I was appalled... yesterday I was thrilled.  I lost my job the first of the year and was looking forward to some "time-off".  I was hoping it would allow me to get a handle on my life... get my house in order, connect with friends I had not had time to see in years, and lose the weight I had gained in the last five years.  You can imagine my frustration when the scale started climbing up and up and up.  How could that happen?  I was going from sitting at a desk all day to being on the move.  How does that make you gain weight??  But, it did.  So, yesterday when I saw that number I was thrilled.  I was hoping it was the sign that I was headed back down.  Today is a different story as I am back up two. 

My foot is killing me.  I need to go to the doctor.  I find it frustrating.  How can I exercise.. and get in shape and lose weight when my foot hurts?  I have been pushing through the pain... and now the pain is getting worse.  It is 11:30am and I have been dressed for the treadmill for four hours.  I think I need to call the doctor, shower, and move on. I have been laying around thinking about it... and not doing anything.

I did decide on a paint color to paint my family room that needs to be painted (and by decide I mean I realized I would be crazy not to listen to my sister who is an interior designer).  I feel motivated to get those projects done... but hampered by my commitment to myself to finish another project I don't feel like facing first.

Really - life has been good.  I have been getting things done and the more I get in order the more empowered I feel.  I think sometimes being tired is just my internal way of crawling up in the fetal position so I don't have to face what the day holds. If only OJ was the secret to getting me 'out' there.

I have discovered one truth about thriving in my journey so far. It is really hard to feel as though you are thriving if you are barely surviving, or even drowning in ONE area of your life. Surviving requires balance. You have to find fulfillment in all areas of your life in order to feel as though you are thriving.

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